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【案例分析】雅思写作9分?并不是那么遥远!

发布时间: 2024年12月23日 12:32

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今天带大看一篇很难得的雅思满分作文。即便是顾北和刘洪波这些雅思写作的泰斗,高也只拿了8.5。据一位雅思写作考官所说,他在8年的工作生涯中,只给过3次9.0。由此可见,雅思写作拿9分,简直比高考试作文拿满分还要难。还有一点要注意的就是,雅思复习资料复习资料后面给出的范文并不是考官写的满分作文,而是考官从考生的作文中挑选的。那么,在雅思写作中是不是必须要举例子呢?看一下雅思大作文的要求你就知道了。

【案例分析】雅思写作9分?并不是那么遥远!今天带大看一篇很难得的雅思满分作文。是一个母语非英语的外学生写的。不知道大对写作拿9.0有没有概念?整个中甚至亚洲,雅思写作得过满分的也只是个位数。即便是顾北和刘洪波这些雅思写作的泰斗,高也只拿了8.5。据一位雅思写作考官所说,他在8年的工作生涯中,只给过3次9.0。由此可见,雅思写作拿9分,简直比高考试作文拿满分还要难。
还有一点要注意的就是,雅思复习资料复习资料后面给出的范文并不是考官写的满分作文,而是考官从考生的作文中挑选的。因为上面写的是“This model has been prepared by an examiner as an example of a very good answer”分数大约在7.5-8.0。所以说真正的满分作文还是很少见的。
好了,我们一起来欣赏和学习一下这篇满分作文吧。
(文章中间标红的部分为考官写的评语。)
Question: Many museums charge for admission while others are free. Do you think the advantages of charging people for admission to museums outweigh the disadvantages?
Some museums have an admission charge while some do not. In my opinion, the drawbacks of an entrance fee are eclipsed by its benefits in the sense that the income will be ploughed back into operation and development of the museums.
Excellent. You have outlined what you are going to talk about and at the same time made your opinion very clear. This is exactly what you need to do to make it clear to the examiner what you think about the question and also helps them to follow the rest of your essay.
A major disadvantage of an admission fee is the possibility of reducing the number of visitors. Museums house exhibitions and artifacts of great educational and historical value. If the chief aim of a museum is to introduce the local community, admission should be free to the public and visitors. Take some folk museums in Hong Kong, which preserve historic relics and display folk customs, for example. Admission to these folk museums, which are often monuments, is free of charge. If they had charged an entrance fee, many might have turned to other activities.
Excellent. Clear and relevant main reasons and fully developed idea. It was great to see how you took one central idea and developed it fully with explanations and specific example.
Granted, an entrance fee might have a negative effect on the admission figures, but an income is favorable to museums in terms of operation. Museums feature educational exhibitions at times, and this could not have been done without a sum of money expended on hiring professionals and buying equipment. The Hong Kong Space Museum, for instance, has monthly exhibitions on different issues and professional docents are employed to take visitors on a guided tour around the museum. This example speaks volume about how a reasonable admission charge is disadvantageous to the operation of a museum.
As above, I particularly like the way you linked both main ideas in the first sentence.
In conclusion, the disadvantages of an admission fee are overshadowed by the benefits accruing from a stable source of income. Therefore, having weighed up the pros and cons, I am convinced that museums should charge an entrance fee for the sake of operation and development.
Very elegant conclusion. You have summarised your main points and reiterated your opinion. Well done.
看完这篇文章,我们会发现,该考生在二段和三段分别举了一个例子来support自己的观点。那么,在雅思写作中是不是必须要举例子呢?看一下雅思大作文的要求你就知道了。
"Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience."
"and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience."这句话就说明,作文中必须要有例子。不仅要有观点的驳论,更要有中肯的例子来支撑你的观点。对于作文想考7.0+的同学来说,例子一定不能少,而且举的例子越贴近西方文化越好,千万不要以自己为例子或者举自己身边的例子。这是雅思写作,不是托福写作。

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